The 5 Most Amazing Real Life Macgyver Moments

Were MacGyver real, the world would be a safer place. And not just for people with mullets. Of course, you'd think that MacGyver's almost supernatural resourcefulness has about as much place in the real world as a guy who shoots spider webs out of his wrists. You'd be wrong.Apparently, people with preternatural resourcefulness exist in real life. Here are five that would have made the bemulleted-one himself beam with the pride of a makeshift heart made out of Popsicle sticks, a timing belt and gum.5A World War II Pilot Used Jell-O to Copy a MapSo it's World War II. You've been sent into a secret Axis meeting room to obtain top-secret maps of the enemy's troop movements. You can't steal the maps because that would raise suspicions and you can't write down the coordinates because you're retarded. Or you don't have a pencil. Whichever is easier for you to believe.All you've got is a wooden tray and a pocket full of Jell-O you snuck out of the mess tent. You don't know why you stole a handful of Jell-O, and you especially don't know why you stored it in your pocket, but there's no turning back now. You can hear guards moving in and you've only got a few minutes to get what you came for. What should you do other than have the most pathetic last meal of all time?According to the book, , a group of British pilots in the Colditz prisoner camp were in that exact same situation. The boys gathered together some of the gelatin they had as rations, put the map face up on a wooden tray and poured the Jell-O (lemon-flavored) over them. They then took the Jell-O and pressed it on a sheet of clear greaseproof paper.It worked. They were able to make 30 copies of the map and enjoyed a tasty meal of lemon-flavored Jell-O because the British were clever, smart and have no taste buds.According to MacGyver, a map "can get you in and out of places a lot of different ways" other than just getting yourself from point A to point B. As this video clearly shows, a map can help you unlock doors, distract women in burkas and beat an armed guard senseless:If the video ran just a little bit longer, MacGyver also could have showed you how a map can help you break up with your pregnant girlfriend, pay off your student loans and establish a Palestinian state. So, yes, while the Jell-O thing was impressive, with 30 copies of a map we're thinking MacGyver could have ended the war.4Two Inmates Escape Prison With Dental FlossApparently, flossing is extremely dangerous. We at Cracked have held a rabid anti-floss position for years now and it looks like our cause will finally gain momentum. Admittedly, we only took this stance due to equal parts of laziness and cheapness, but it's nice to learn that we've been unconsciously avoiding accidentally flossing our faces off all this time.According to 's "Quite Interesting" column,Italian mob boss Vincenzo Curcio had been convicted of murder and wasfacing further prosecution for seven more murders. Desperate to flee,he escaped from his cell in 2000 in Turin by sawing through the barswith nothing more than simple dental floss. You know, the stuff your dentist tells you to put in your mouth every single night? That stuff.The same year, the Associated Press reported that Antonio Lara escapedfrom a state prison in Palestine, Texas by coating the bars with toothpaste and cutting through the bars with dental floss. He didn't escape from the jail, just his cell, so he could kill a rival inmate. Whether or not it was with the floss, we don't know, but we can always dream.How were they able to cut through steel with floss? Floss isunbelievably durable, apparently almost magically so. According to the book , floss can replace the hanging wires for pictures frames, replace the threading in outdoor backpacks and tents, and remove a stuck ring off of a finger. We're assuming this is done by sawing your finger off with the floss.When imprisoned in a basement (by Tia Carrera, in episode 320) he didn't settle for floss or any combination of dental hygiene products. Instead, he uses a set of cables and a pair of hi-fi stereo speakers to act as a sonar detector to find a secret door. Wait, why couldn't he have just knocked on the wall like Indiana Jones would have? How much of MacGyver's overly elaborate gadgetry was just him showing off?3Three Inmates Escape Alcatraz On A Raft Of RaincoatsFrank Morris, John Anglin and Clarence Anglin are the three men whomanaged to do something no one thought anyone could do: They escapedone of the most escape-proof prisons in the country and spawned amovie that somehow made their escapades seem as boring as prison life itself.The story of the Alcatraz Three's escape is full of MacGyverisms, from the tools they made to dig through the concrete walls (a drill theymade out of a vacuum cleaner motor), to the dummy heads they made fromsoap and toilet paper.It's no surprise they were able to pull off such an amazing feat. According to several sources, Morris had an astronomical IQ and spent his life from childhood in and out of prisons. His numerous escape attempts were the reason he had been sent to Alcatraz in the hopes he wouldn't be able to make another attempt. Little did they realize that he was just warming up.Frank and the Anglin Brothers made it out of their cells and down tothe shore line with a makeshift raft that they constructed out of 50raincoats stolen or borrowed from other inmates. Then they made their way through the currents with paddles made out of plywood. TheDiscovery Channel's replicated the raincoat raft myth itself by padding to shore from the Rock in a similar vessel.The three men were never heard from again and Alcatraz's once gloriousreputation was tarnished. Defeated, the San Francisco Chamber of Commerce had no choice but turn it into a tacky tourist destination that sells T-shirts like "I Got Shanked in Alcatraz and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt."The MacGyver method is as simple as faking his own death, waiting until they're carrying him out in his coffin, and then using . We forgot to mention he built a jet ski at some point.Wait, did he flip those guys off at the end there? Awesome.2A Professor Uses Shrinky Dinks To Make Scientific BreakthroughSo far, these devices have been used to get people out of jams andtight spots when a matter of seconds drew the line between life andcertain death. This one doesn't involve death, per say, unless youreplace a "matter of seconds that draws the line between life and death"With "losing a million dollar grant that draws the line between winningthe Nobel Prize for engineering and teaching high school chemistry to idiots."Professor Michelle Khine of the University of California, Merced was doing a study of microfluidics, which from the word, you can guess is the study of fluids in tiny things (like the inside of computer chips). Unfortunately, she didn't have much to work with in terms of materials. So she turned to Shrinky Dinks, those childhood toys that encourage children to color and stick their hands in ovens.According to magazine, she designed several microfluidicpatterns on actual Shrinky Dinks plastic, put them in her own oven athome and found it worked perfectly because the tubes through which thefluid ran actually enlarged as the plastic got smaller. Thus shemanaged to do something that companies such as Intel spend millions ofdollars a year, and to do it on the budget of a kid who saved up his allowance.We can't fathom a situation where MacGyver would have to build amicrofluidic device. But if there was a lady in the room, we're guessing he'd use it as an excuse to remove his pants:1Astronauts Build an Air Scrubber Out of Random JunkWhen it comes to pulling off the ultimate MacGyverism, no one can do itbetter than NASA. Their engineers have to be ready at a moment'snotice to find new ways to build complicated machines and mechanismsout of everyday objects because, as the Apollo 13 mission proved, younever know if you'll have an emergency that won't have a contingencyplan in place and (as every other mission has since proved) you neverknow what NASA is going to cut out of their budgets next.When astronauts Jim Lovell, John Swigert and Fred Haise had to movefrom the command module to the LEM in order to conserve power to runtheir navigational computer, they didn't realize the calculations foroxygen consumption were only made for two people instead of three. Sotheir carbon dioxide levels began to skyrocket. They had a lithiumhydroxide canister on board. However, the plug for the canister on theLEM was round and the canister itself was square.NASA Flight Controller Gene Krantz (for those of you who haven'tpicked up a history textbook since elementary school, he was played byEd Harris in the movie) wrote in his book that their only option--not including failure--was to get their engineers to build a makeshift air scrubber out of things they had laying around the ship.The crew didn't, as we would have done, admit defeat, light cigarettes and try to bone something one last time before their slow and painful death, which is just one major difference between the Cracked staff and NASA astronauts. Instead, working for an entire day and a half withoutsleep, they came up with this: The plastic flight cover would act as afunnel through which the lithium hydroxide was pumped through a suithose, into a fan and then through a sock, which acted as the filter.The whole thing was held together with duct tape.Yes, this sounds like something out of a cartoon. But it worked, saving the lives of three astronauts and ensuring that Tom Hanks would go on to become an Oscar-nomination machine.Unless Hollywood buys our screenplay, we may never know how he would handle himself in a space shuttle. Further, We can't find an episode where the Gyver had to clear out a smoke-filled room. We're guessing having to build an air filter would be too many steps for him to handle.However, since he knows a thing or two about creating smoke screens (episode 102: he uses fire ash, rice alcohol and a car exhaust to create a painful wall of tear gas, episode 116: he burns pesticide, soap flakes and tile cleaner in a saucepan to create a smokescreen, etc.), we're convinced he could at least build an ingenious device to a capsule full of astronauts. Or at least build the world's most kick-ass bong.(Note to Hollywood: we also have a script in the works if you do decide to go with the bong angle.)

The 5 Most Amazing Real Life Macgyver Moments 1

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